Mother's Day - 2014

It's been a tough week. We have been feeling discouraged with the new onset of bleeding and fear of losing the baby. Thursday was particularly tough as my symptoms got worse. After a visit to our doctor's office, they suggested I could check myself into the hospital for observation to ensure my blood levels didn't get too low and my symptoms didn't get worse. Matt and I talked about it and decided to see how Thursday night and Friday went before making the decision.

It was another pivotal moment in this pregnancy where I was reminded how I don't have any control over the outcome of this pregnancy. We said a lot of prayers, and I know a lot of you did as well. Thankfully my symptoms have been improving the last week days and I haven't had to go to the hospital. This week I was reminded of two things -

1. God is writing this story, not me. I have said that along the way, but it is easy to forget when things start to get better and you feel "in control" of your situation again. But I'm not. What I can focus on is what God is teaching me through this, and what I am learning about Him through this tough time. The Truth is that fear and worry do not come from God. So, when I start to feel that way, I have to refocus.

2 Timothy 1:7
"For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and love and discipline."

Matthew 6:25-27, 34
“So I tell you, don’t worry about the food or drink you need to live, or about the clothes you need for your body. Life is more than food, and the body is more than clothes. Look at the birds in the air. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, but your heavenly Father feeds them. And you know that you are worth much more than the birds. You cannot add any time to your life by worrying about it. So don’t worry about tomorrow, because tomorrow will have its own worries. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

2. Speaking of refocusing, I fail to spend enough time talking about the amazing son we have. Carter is the most precious little boy; full of energy, humor, new words and new ideas each day. He is the biggest joy in our lives and we are SO THANKFUL for him!

I am thankful to celebrate being a mom today. It is a special role that I have been given. It is tough too - exhausting. (There are moments where I feel like I am losing my mind). But having Carter as my son and experiencing life with him far outweighs those moments.

Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there. And special prayers to each of you who have lost a child and feel great pain on this day. I am thinking about you as well.

Matt reminded me how funny our little boy is the other night when we watched our little fire-fighter-with-no-pants in this video.